Fallout/Forward

Hiya

At the time of writing, WWE comes fresh off of Wrestlemania, edition 29. Every year, I keep wondering if the quality will continue to deteriorate, as the main shows have. There's a lot of factors playing as of now, but everyone with half a brain has already gone into too much detail on that, so let's focus on the point for a change.

Wrestlemania, there was a time when I would simply stay up for half the night and watch it, with boatloads of coffee on hand. The last time that happened was 4 years ago. In those 4 years, I never could bring myself to sitting through the entire event. This year was no different, so as always, I'm going to take you through the result and offer my take on them.

First up is the pre-show. A whole lot of talking and video packages. In between all of that, a match between The Miz and Wade Barrett, for Barrett's intercontinental title. Hang on, a title match on the pre-show? I know that WWE doesn't really give half a shit about the mid-card titles, but doing it on a free-for-all pre-show is selling it short. 

Alas, but on with it. Definitely not a spectacular match, but enough to warm up the crowd. Miz wins the title using the Figure Four. Ever since Ric Flair proverbially passed the torch, Miz has been spamming the fuck out of that move. Ah well, it works for Miz, so I'm game. 

I really don't get why Miz is still disliked with the smarks. His WWE title reign was one of highs and lows, but any guy who still sees Mike Mizanin, semi-star of "the Real World", should really start considering taking his blinders off. He was fucking over as a heel for most of the time (one could argue that Morrison helped achieve that), and he's managed to smoothly transition into a face persona. I wouldn't call myself a fan of his, but I can honestly say he deserves a lot more credit than he's been given the past couple years.

Orton, Sheamus & Show vs The Shield.

The whole Shield storyline has been a little underwhelming so far. It started off quite well, but got a little more weary with every passing week. They needed a big win to go on, and the otherwise ass backwards creative team gave it to them. Against some of the "top guys" no less. Expectations are high for Rollins and Ambrose. This Reigns chap, I'm not sure. Haven't seen enough of this guy to really judge his work, but I've been hearing he's fairly green. Of course, in WWE, talent doesn't correlate with success.

The way going forward is simple. Orton should've been heel for a year or two. Make it happen. As for the Shield ... more airtime is necessary. They need a big storyline going forward. Let's face it, this faction has at least two insanely talented guys who have the ability to be big players in the near future. I like Rollins, but as of writing, I'm sure Dean Ambrose is a breakout star.

Ryback vs Mark Henry

Your typical filler match. The kind of match that goes either way and has fuck all effect on things going forward. Slightly surprised though that Mark Henry went over Ryback. Also, no fallout on this, whatsoever? Could've been a decent feud that lasted a couple of months if anything. 

Hell No vs Ziggler/Langston

Is this what Ziggler has been relegated to? You could make a case for Kane and Bryan not belonging in this position, but especially Ziggles has been dealt a very weird hand. Am I mistaken in thinking that this guy should be holding a world championship? Something he could've very easily have done, if he was allowed to cash in. Yet, he's now relegated to being a vehicle to help push this NOD nostalgia act over. 

Y2J vs Fandango

Vince is high on this Fandango. He's not high on Antonio Cesaro. Nothing against Johnny Curtis (he was fucking awesome as the immensely creepy and awkward guy on NXT), but this character just seems off. It's gonna take a whole load of effort to make this character somewhat redeemable. Of course, going over Jericho at Mania could do just that. Let's hope so.

Del Rio vs Swagger - WHC

The feeling of MEH overwhelms me. While I like Del Rio, the character comes across way too forced, and I still have my suspicion on whether or not he is world champion material. I guess creative thinks he is, since he took a win over the revived Jack Swagger to retain. Swagger got a much needed makeover some time ago, and it helped him heaps. Thankfully Uncle Zebekiah is there to help him. I wonder what's next. There's a possibly lengthy feud going forward, which is good.

And then there's MOTN. Undertaker vs CM Punk

You could almost guess this would be the highlight of the event, as it has been for several years. If Taker is in good enough shape to work a proper match, one with Punk would blow the roof off. And every report reads the same thing: "match of the night".

Of course, that Taker wins is no surprise. It shouldn't even be any question. If Taker is at 'mania, taker wins. It's that simple. 

Triple H vs Lesnar - No Holds Barred

If Triple H lost, Triple H would have to retire. Makes perfect sense, since Trips has been handling a lot of duties backstage. A loss as such would've been no more than logical. A long and hard match and Brock would go over. Brock looks strong, Trips can focus on his work behind the scenes. Seems like the feasible option right?

Then why did Triple H go over? Why did Triple H have to go over Lesnar? I wonder. Perhaps we'll have to wait for Raw to see what's next. It better be a good reason. Not that I'm particularly fond of Lesnar, but he got cheated out of a logical victory here. 

Now the main event, the WWE title match.

Rocky (c) vs Cena.

Stevie Wonder saw this coming. Of course Cena would go over. They need a champion who can be at Raw every week. Not that I'm happy Cena is champ (anything but), but he's a better option than Rocky, for sure.  
Rock could sit back and watch his new feud with Lesnar being set up for next year's WM. Though, I read only an hour ago that the People's Champ has abandoned his flock and went back to LA. Seems like he's walking out. Ah, Hollywood stars....

Some more rumors have come forward. People believe that RVD, who was at the HOF ceremony, might return. Though he hinted that a WWE return wasn't out of the question, it's not THAT likely. I'm putting more faith in a return of Christian, who's been out of action since mid 2012. I for one cannot wait!

Going forward, I hope Vince removes his head 1 inch further from his ass. Cesaro should get every fucking push possible. He's nothing short of awesome. AND PLEASE! GIVE PAIGE A CHANCE TO PROPERLY DEBUT. Ironically, she outshines every fucking diva in nxt in ring skill. And she's pretty too. A mildly risqué photoshoot and she'll be over with every guy in the audience who has a functioning penis. Sad, but true. 

That be it, then. Until next time.


~D.