Tuesday, 10 December 2013

updatey thing for the hell of it.

Bollocks.


That serves both as an introduction to this entry as well as my general perception of the pro wrestling business. Not really, just the internationally televised side of it.


Do I know who currently holds a title in WWE? Nope. Dare I bet John Cena is one of them? Despite the fact that he was heavily injured and was expected to be out for an almost paradise-like 4 to 6 months. Let me check .... 


of course he's the champ. I'll refrain from beating the dead horse some more and let you draw your own conclusions. There is one humongous flipside though. With his early returns each and every FUCKING time,  he's profusely shortening his career. While I don't wish the rat bastard any harm, he should fuck off for real ... preferably with his lady in tow. Since a change in gimmick (or even just alignment) that actual lovers of pro wrestling have been begging for since 2007 (that's 6 fucking years going on 7!!) and should have gotten two years prior, isn't likely to happen now.


Speaking of ladies, I religiously watch Total Divas, because it's the only way you can see the current crop of divas (and TJ Wilson) show actual human emotions. The show is so delightfully cringeworthy I continuously wonder why I'm wasting my time on it. I can't present an honest answer, but I'm pretty sure it's not for my entertainment. There's only so much banter about Nikki Bella's giant tits I can cope with before it completely transcends into fucking uselessness. It wasn't much to begin with.



Speaking of giant tits(*)... Hulk Hogan left TNA (YAY!) and is booked to return to WWE (NAYYY!). Well, the rumours are there, but you can be damn sure that both parties are interested. Each and every time these rumours surface (and end up true) I ponder over the fact that there are still so many people excited for it. Really? I mean, really? No, seriously... Is there another dead horse that I can beat?


 It would mean though that I am now able to watch TNA again. And still I don't want to. I'll end up having to watch NXT more often. Lots of indie favorites working there. Sami Callihan debuted like 10 minutes ago, Davey Richards and Eddie Edwards are doing try outs and impressing the shit out of the officials, El Generico has been doing well... It would even compensate for the lack of Chris Hero, who is simply back to being Chris Hero. 


That, or I could just stop watching it altogether for the time being. It makes very little difference. I don't know about you guys, but I'm pretty much done wishing for the status quo to subside and I sure as hell can't be arsed to scour the net for the really good wrestling. 


Perhaps, until the next time. Have a nice solstice and a good start to the new year. Perhaps I'll be back around March to vent over the missed opportunities for Wrestlemania. Why break with tradition, heh?


~D.


(*) The whole line about Nikki Bella's giant tits was solely for the purpose of this segue. Thank you for your understanding.


6 comments:

  1. funny to see you moving away while I grow fond (again) of the wwe. it´s not like i watch shows but i do peek at the dirtsheets more than i care to admit

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  2. fuck this mobile comment i cant edit. anyway i do like the backdtage buzz and recently they promoted Randy Borton and Bryan a lot, gave Punk decent air time while Ryback became a dick and crushed his own push by mimicking Goldberg's finishers. They're trying to refresh old storylines of unification for titles in a Cena vs Orton feud involving Punk and Bryan who is over as fuck right now. Oh, and they dropped the masked Kane gimmick to have him wear a suit. I hear the upcoming WTF and join you on that one. Anyway, I'm curious to see where things go and not so much into matches. So much for a wrestling fan, eh?

    ER

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  3. If there was any way to accurately put into words how violently I am shaking my head, I'd do it. I guess I have, hah. They are actually running the Cena vs Orton program again? It's like I've travelled back in time to a (far too lengthy) period where I also didn't give a shit about a match between them. The unification thing doesn't make it interesting, even. It's like serving the same turd on a fancy plate. Tell me Orton is at the very least heel.

    Ryback obviously killed his push by being a one-dimensional hack. Thank fuck Bryan gets some buzz.

    I've also heard they're looking to push Castagnoli as a face, because of a "popular move"? I saw him do the "giant swing". Unless he pulls off the 100 second swing like he did in Chikara, it's almost pointless.

    As for Kane ... does it really matter anymore? That character died a slow death when he took off the mask the first time around and everyone saw he was the dentist all along. The last attempt at making Kane "scary" again failed miserably after the whole anger management shtick (even if it was mildly amusing).

    Actually, I really feel you should give me a wrestling-related subject every so often and I could write about that. When I do these entries, I just about forget half of what I intended to write about anyway :p

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  4. a topic which you'll dignify with your (brutal-snarky-honest) opinion? I would very much ask you your top ten factions/stables to have existed in your book ;)

    ER

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  5. consider it done! I'll even have some banjo playing in the background just to make sure I'm at my most annoyed :p

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    1. As I'm writing, I mean. I'm not going to embed background music to annoy everyone else :d

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